Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
