I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize