Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
