a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
