That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
