it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
