obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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