Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
