omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
