Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
