You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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