And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
What drink are we having for lunch?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
