So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
