fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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