We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
