I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
