So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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