Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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