omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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