Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
