coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
