That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
