Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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