normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
