Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
i need to put some appletini on your dick
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
