4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
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