Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize