He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
We had sex on a dog bed..
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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