were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
