my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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