I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
