I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
the liver wants what the liver wants
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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