dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
