I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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