She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
