Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
