he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
