I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Your mouth is God's brothel.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
