That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
