When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
