when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
The beers last night were like the tears from god
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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