I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
