He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Oh god it's open bar.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
