Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
