I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I think weed is turning my hair brown
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
If I die, sorry about rent.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Randomize
