Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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