Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
