Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
