Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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