My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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