Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
