No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
